Good luck - very few people can teach themselves calculus entirely on their own.
If you want to try, I would recommend getting your hands on a calculus textbook and reading it. Start at chapter one, and make sure you read the proofs and examples very thoroughly. Reading proofs is not easy; you have to go through them one line at a time, and resist the temptation to move on to the next line until you know *exactly* what the author is doing - and why.
Once you completely understand the proofs & examples, start doing the problems. That's the best way to ensure that you actually *do* understand what's going on, instead of just *thinking* you understand it. You don't want to settle for a level of understanding where you can just follow along when someone else is doing a problem; you want to be able to solve the problems on your own, without any help.
BTW, for me at least, this is the only way to learn math. I learn much better from the book than from any professor or tutor. The professors and tutors are useful if you get stuck, but it's best to get yourself unstuck without help if you can.
Again, good luck. Learning calculus on your own is a heckuva project.
Hope that helps!